Getting Ready

ok, so i told my parent……….and the world has yet to come to an end. According to my cuz the fidalgo’s have a way of feeling the world will end without us. however, there are other shoulders to bare the load. So im suoer excited to take this huge step and at the same time i have so many reservations.  grandma and grandpa are one big con to leaving. however, melissa is my rock and she is coming with me, so that will help. i dont’t know what i would be without her support.  emotionally i know i wouldn’t be able to do it alone. weak……maybe……but i have always had a weak spot for the family. however, i feel like i have to do this or face a regret that i may never be able to overcome.

Ledges and Bones

Well Shit! ok i auditioned aug 10th for holly johnson’s company on aug 10th the day before our last day in L.A.  Both melissa and i didn’t hear anything from holly.  Even though after the audition holly told me she wanted to put me on her short list i didn’t hear anything from her. We came home and got back to life as usual. i wasn’t really happy about the fact that i didn’t hear anything, but it wasn’t that big of a deal. I just felt like i was meant for more than working in the office at Brian’s On-site Recycling Inc. (even though it was my office and i ran it how i saw fit) Well no sooner than i was talking about not getting picked and Holly called. “i would like to invite you to join my company,” i was still thinking about seeing her name on my caller ID. well i think this could be an amazing journey for me. i think i have been waiting for something ( anything) to compel me to leave and find my own way. The problem is what i feel for my family. i feel indebted to them. i feel like it is my responsibility as a Fidalgo to take care of my people. however that may mean i have to give up that which i love most. ” Dance!” ohh the thoughts i have! i need to find some way to figure things out. It doesn’t help that melissa says she won’t come unless she has a stable job. Also the subbie needs to be traded in, but the car i “Want” to replace it is gonna cost me another $150 in payments and another $150 in insurance. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG! hope i can figure it out by my birthday!

-B